Location: In my bedroom overlooking the quiet French village just before 5:00am on the 12 of July.
It is my favorite time of day. I love these wee morning hours when the world is still, the birds are finishing their dreams before they begin their songs, and the sun is stretching and warming up before rising for its daily race across the sky.
I am thankful for last night's headache, because it sent me to bed early so I could enjoy this morning. Yet I am grateful that the headache is gone; I have had two in the last few days after having none for quite some time. Thank you for your prayers.
There are many things I could tell you, but I have nothing to say, really. Friday was a fun day of hanging out with the American couple across the street. E. and I worked on his computer a little (we have more work to do!), and in the afternoon they took me along when they went to pick cherries! (By the way, E. really wants me to post this picture of the woodpile near the cherry trees, overlooking the village. That should be enough fuel for the winter, woodn't you think?!) That evening, my hostess, N., and I went to Verdun to have dinner with the octogenarian whose yard I had worked in last week. While N. ran some errands before dinner, I sat and watched the locals play "boules," a tradional French game of lawn bowling. Then we stopped by the house of N.'s aunt--she is 101 year old! When I told her I wanted to take a picture of me with a century of France, she said I was too tall and hurried to grab a stool and climb up on it so we would be the same size! Later that evening, I also managed to use the Bluetooth function on my laptop to transfer N.'s photos from her cell phone to her computer. You know this is a small village when I am the computer expert!!!
Yesterday was fine, too. I visited with the Americans a little before heading to the town of Vauquois for a two-hour tour of the four-year battle zone from World War I (in fact, most of the big-name Americans in WWII found themselves there during WWI, such as Patton and Truman). The majority of the tour is underground, as both the Germans and the French dug tunnels and galleries under the town on the hill, setting explosives there. The Germans had an entire town underground and actually lived there. It was certainly interesting, and hopefully the one photo I took turns out so I can post it. However, I could not take more, because there is a certain oppressive horror that settled around me as I thought about all the ways we come up with to kill each other. I hate it. Later in the afternoon, I spent several hours playing with my hostess' seven-year-old grandniece and some neighborhood kids, and I had to chide one of them who was playing dangerously with a knife. Why are we humans so fascinated with violence?
The over-arching theme for yesterday, then, was a siege of thinking. Even before I visited the historical site, I was extremely pensive and prayerful. In fact, I wanted to get away from everyone so I could think, but I also wanted to get away from my thoughts. I did spend a time in the empty church yesterday, playing the old keyboard in there and singing praises. The echo is magnificent!
What was I thinking about? I was thinking about the people for whom I have been praying, interceding. Many people I know and love--many of you--are going through great struggles and growth. I was thinking about the rest of this summer as I prepare to move on soon, wondering what the LORD has in store for me. I was thinking about what God is doing in Romania and what my friends there have been doing and feeling. I was thinking about my friendships from the past several years that have both sustained me and challenged me, sometimes hurting a lot, sometimes bringing great joy--sometimes both simultaneously. I was thinking further into the future, about the end of my European summer, what that might mean, when that might be, the different opportunities I have. I was imagining different lifestyles, depending on where I end up residing, whether I have a family or not, what "home" might mean for a free-spirit like me.
Even as I type, knowing that this barely uncovers a glimpse of my musings, tears come to my eyes and a little light comes to the morning skies. I love the LORD Jesus. That is all there is to it.
Most people here cannot begin to understand that, because they think so much in terms of religion and tradition that they cannot imagine relationship when it comes to God. But most people in the States do not get it either. I know that because things would be a lot different if they did. I can assure you from my experience that a life of living full-throttle with the LORD, of following Him no matter the cost, of adventuring with Him at every moment, of surrendering to His Spirit daily...that life is matchless! Pain, burdens, responsibilities, obstacles, lessons, and goodbyes come with it. But so do countless blessings, joys, rewards, love, and a parent-child intimacy with the Living God! Oh, how I wish the people here knew Him! Oh, how I hope you know Him! Look beyond this world's broken Church, through the denominations and doctrines, past the traditions and religious histories and seek the LORD while He may be found--call upon Him while He was near! You will find Him when you seek Him with your whole heart! He is so merciful that He has even allowed Himself to be found by those that did not seek Him!
Friend, you may think me a fool. You may look with disdain upon my spontaenous wanderings across a European continent that often end up with me washing dishes. You may consider me some sort of religious fanatic who vomits his writing onto a long-winded blog. But, Friend, look at the world around you. Look at the things the world esteems to be of value, to be holy. Look at our fixation with violence and death and evil. Look at the lifestyles that hold us prisoner, forcing so many people to pretend they are happy during year upon year of misery. Look at all that and ask yourself if it may not be worth looking into what this fool is talking about . . .
