Location: In a sleeping apartment in Oradea, Romania, 6:00am on June 18.
I have already been enjoying the day for several hours--the sun seemed to sleep in a bit today. It has been a wonderful day as the Lord woke me up and invited me into a moving time of prayer. Many of you were there, too, whether you knew it or not. I thank the Lord for you and for His work in you.
What can I say except that I have been blessed beyond measure? And I pray that every blessing, every moment of my life, every bit of who I am is only for the glory of God. Today I celebrate, that He might get the glory!
That may be a foreign concept to you, especially if you have not yet realized that the reason God sent Jesus was to invite us into intimate love with Him, the God of the Universe. You may never think about God or His glory. Prayer may not sound pleasant, especially in the middle of the night.
That's okay. The Lord will continue to love you as He invites you closer and closer to Him. Let me tell you about how He has been loving me.
I am in a part of the world that I hardly knew existed, thanks to an odd sequence of events that included a French degree and a mysterious knee injury and a God that pulled me through the darkest times of my life when I was not even sure He existed. Certainly, I am athletic, but I have no great love for constant sports, especially American football. Nevertheless, last night found us in the park with a dozen friends, five of whom were kids twelve and under, playing football and Frisbee and keep-away (called "Cat and Mouse" here). Earlier in the day I had taught the young people with disabilities how to do the Hokey Pokey, and only one was pulled out of his wheelchair during Tug-O-War! We had been able to visit the gymnasium of a local high school to use their facilities for therapy and games. Their smiles were wonderful!
In fact, yesterday was a day of laughter! J. got tickled a few times and basically fell over laughing, and her laugh is so contagious that everyone else joins in no matter if they do not know why! I enjoy laughing, so I participated, too!
So here I find myself being blessed by people I did not know three weeks ago through laughter and sports. A visiting American missionary had to go to the hospital with some sort of food-poisoning, yet N. and I have been healthy the whole time. Many people (here and in much of the world) do not have jobs, and N. and I get to work with wonderful people in all sorts of settings here! And this is only a brief global stop among the many places I have visited or lived!
If you can read and comprehend these writings about my life without seeing the work of God, I am truly amazed. I can tell you that I am who I am only because of who He is. I am only who I am because of the loving God who listens to and answers the prayers from the hearts of many people. I can tell you that I am able to eat bugs (I know I ate one yesterday), to learn other languages, to interact with people far different than me, to leave my loved-ones behind as I cross oceans, to sell my possessions, to live happily "unemployed", to survive dangerous situations, and so much more only because of the grace and power of a Living God.
Yes, I am weird. You cannot look at me an see a "normal" young man in the context of this world. I do not fit. But do you see anything you like? Do you see that "normal" is often over-rated, or just plain wrong? Do you see that there is a better way? Do you see that God made you to be someone, YOU, and you do not have to spend all of your time wondering what everyone else thinks about you? (I promise that the rest of the world is too self-centered to even be thinking about you at all 99% of the time.) Do you see that you have dreams and passions for a reason, that you were given a heart and a mind? Do you see that you do not have to stay in a rut, that you can make decisions and purposefully interact with the people around you, impacting and influencing lives even as you are impacted and influenced?
What if only one life was influenced for the better because of your life? Wouldn't that be worth it? And I can assure you that if you are more than one year old, dear Reader, you have already impacted many lives for the better! God is at work in you whether you recognize Him or not!
Today, I celebrate you, because you were hand-crafted by a loving God. I do not know why you are reading this blog today, but I hope you come away with hope. I hope you come away encouraged, knowing that you are loved. I hope you come away with the desire to encourage someone else today, to remind them that their value, like yours, is very precious, because they bear the fingerprints of a compassionate, merciful Maker.
I hope that you are not afraid of these questions. I hope that you are not afraid of the questions inside of you. N. and I were just laughing the other day because he asks questions looking for answers about everything! That is because he was trained as a mechanical engineer. Me, on the other hand . . . I was trained as a philosopher, and I learned that my questions often lead to more questions, so I am comfortable leaving a question unanswered for quite a while. If you have questions, take a look at them. Feel free to email me about them, or journal about them, or pray about them. Questions lead us to the Truth, and God is the source of Truth. That might be a scary thought at first, but I can tell you from lots of international experience that there could be no better way!
I bless you in the Name of Jesus!
This blog is your opportunity to travel with me wherever I am in the world, during both the mundane and exciting moments of life that I humbly recognize as holy. As I bare my life to you, may your reading take you beyond my words to the Word, beyond my life to the Life, beyond the chaos to the Truth, and beyond teachings to the Teacher--the Rabboni. I promise it will be an adventure, and by the end, may you, too, truly know the Way!
A Rose From Home
My Story (As prepared for my church congregation this spring--2009)
I have a story to tell you. I am the main character, but the story is not about me. I have traveled several parts of the world, but my adventure has been closer to home. I am twenty-six years old. My story begins like many of yours…
I grew up going to church. I had been born into a family who labeled themselves “Christian,” in a country that labels itself “Christian.” Every Sunday found me attending a worship service and Sunday school in a mainline denomination church. I served as an acolyte, attended Vacation Bible School, helped my dad count and record the offering money, sang in the youth choir, was a leader in the youth group, and occasionally served as liturgist. Baptized as an infant, I was confirmed at the age of twelve, thus becoming an “official” member of the church. Then, hurt by the church, my family left to find another.
Have you ever been hurt by the Church?
After months of searching, we settled into a very large independent church. Things were different there, and I was quickly welcomed and at home among new friends that truly had a passion for Jesus. The Word of God was taught boldly from the pulpit, and I was introduced to a missions-aware lifestyle. So it was with regret that I said goodbye only a couple of years later to move with my family to another church. I purposely remained aloof, not wanting to make new friendships before I left for college a year later. Besides, I was loosing my faith—or so I thought—and I didn’t want anyone to know. I was asking scary questions like “Is there really a God?” and, if so, “Is He the Christian God?” and “Would I be Christian if I had been born in another part of the world?”
Have you ever asked yourself unsettling questions about what you believe?
So I headed into college under a cloud of confusion that only worsened for the next two years. Though I didn’t know what I believed anymore, I continued to go to church every Sunday, and to help lead worship in chapel. Most importantly, even during this questioning, I continued my morning habit of daily study of the Bible. I had begun at age twelve, reading at first a chapter per day, then ten minutes each morning, then an half-hour, and so on. So, only by the grace of the very God I doubted, I remained anchored in His Word and in His community, though I felt like a fake most of the time. Since then I have learned that “fake” is the worst insult the world can give us; that is why the label of “hypocrite” is so offensive.
Have you ever felt like a fake?
Six weeks with missionaries in South Africa followed by a year in France began to teach me what life with God is all about. I began rebuilding my faith, this time it belonged to me, in contrast to me borrowing the faith of my parents, church, or anyone else. In my parent’s basement in 2003, on either Christmas Eve or New Year’s Eve, I invited Jesus to live in me; perhaps I had done so before, but I didn’t recall—but since 2003, I have never forgotten that moment. Unfortunately, nothing changed. I continued to do my best to act like a Christian, as I had done for so long.
Have you ever found yourself “doing your best” to be a good person, or to act like a Christian?
Though I did not realize it at the time, I was quenching the Spirit, even though I had welcomed Him into my life. During the next few years, the LORD continued to nurture me, and slowly things began to change. Several tough months in Idaho birthed my prayer-life. I spent three years being humbled in a job that was my informal seminary training. In 2007, a short stint in Mexico helped me to see things as they were, and not long afterward, I was baptized by immersion. No baptism of any kind can save a lost soul—only Jesus can do that. However, this baptism was an important covenant between me and God, symbolizing not only my death and resurrection with Jesus and my public profession of faith, but it also my life change, the beginning of my bearing fruit. “For each tree is known by its own fruit…”according to Luke 6:44. During the past year and a half, the LORD has provided me with an informal pastoral internship in my church, teaching me every aspect of discipleship. Simultaneously, I have been studying unceasing prayer and worship. I am now very different than I was five years ago.
In the Book of Acts (which tells the story of the earliest years of the Church) every time a person decided to follow Christ, two things took place—though not always in the same order. Each person experienced a life change, which I call the “baptism of repentance,” as well as the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, which I call the “baptism of the Spirit.” Looking back, I realize that the Holy Spirit was living in me in 2003, but it wasn’t until I surrendered everything to God, as represented by my immersion, that I allowed the Spirit to have His way in me and transform my life. “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now life in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. (Galatians 2:20)”
Have you invited Jesus to live in you? Have you allowed the Spirit to transform your life?
I tell you this story for two reasons. First, I tell this story in order to boast in the LORD! May God our Father get all praise and glory forever! Second, I tell this story because it is relevant to you. Likely you have heard that I am leaving the country: I have let my light shine before you; please let your light shine within the Church, too! This congregation is in revival, and as each of you allows the Spirit to revive you, the entire Church will be revived and utterly transformed, to the glory of the Most High God. And for His glory is the reason He created us; the reason He sent His only Son to reveal Himself to us; the reason He became Sin for us and died for us on the cross—while we were still sinners; and the reason that He conquered death and offered us eternal life with Him.
It will cost you a lot—in fact, it will cost you everything, your very life. But if you have never surrendered your life to Christ Jesus, if you have never invited Him to send His Spirit into you and to transform your life, then do it right now. Just let go of everything to which you are desperately clinging; stop trying to do it yourself! This is the very reason you are still breathing in this physical life—God has been delaying His judgment of this sinful world because He is waiting for you—2 Peter 3:9 says He wants none to perish!
If you have already invited the Spirit into your life, then live like it! Bear fruit! Anyone and everyone who meets you or knows you or sees you or hears you should know immediately and clearly that Jesus the Christ lives in you and loves them! That is how stark the contrast should be between your life and the world around you!
Have you immersed yourself in God’s Word and in prayer in the last twenty-four hours?
If you call yourself a follower of Christ, then there is no excuse for not communing with Him daily! Anchor yourself in the Word! God has revealed Himself to us through His Son, Jesus Christ, and the Bible is a complete and accurate record of that revelation. And prayer is humbly letting Him love us. Let Him love you! God doesn’t need us, but He wants us! God doesn’t need us to live for Him—He wants to live in and through us! Let us love and fellowship with one another, even when you disagree! Pray for each other—the names in the church directory are a great place to start! Church, we are not only the Body of Christ, but we are the Bride of Christ. We have allowed ourselves to get bedraggled and stained—now let us stand to the glory of God! Let’s let Him purify us, restore us, and love us!
My dear Brothers and Sisters, if you have ever once been blessed by God our Father at work in me, then I urge you, please, take seriously His desire to love and work in you, beyond anything you can ask or imagine! I have told you the beginning of my story—may it end in glory to the Father, in the Name of Jesus, by way of His Spirit.
Now, what is your story?